Knute strikes back

Knute is back with predictions...and I think I saw Oprah somewhere in his column...

Knute here with some musings on a snowy day and a word or two from TOCB.

The Ol' Crystal Ball is having a crisis of confidence this week what with going 1-2 last week. I tried to cheer the prophetic orb up by giving him a good dusting with some lemon fresh Windex and an extra soft cloth but the old chap still seems a bit down. So I turned to that old standby used by so many sports fans when they find themselves adrift on a sea of woe: Blame BYU.

I told TOCB that if the mean old Cougy-Woogies hadn't so foolishly won last week he would have been an acceptable 2-1. I then went on a 10 minute rant about the use of tithing money as part of the athletic budget and another 20 minute rant on the insidiousness of the "Closet Cougar" disease that strikes so many otherwise rational people and takes them from their cozy seats at Taxpayer Stadium to the Pollyanna-ish confines of The Cathedral of the Pseudo-Apostle of the Perpetual Frown. Thus, other local schools suffer because of those evil mountain cats.

This seemed to cheer up said Orb of Wonder and it really struck a chord with my Ute fan co-workers who overhead the conversation. They are now blaming their recent loss on the Cougars and all is right in the Utah sports scene!

Here's a quick look at reader mail:

One reader who took his Zoloft this morning sent me this email:

The Aggies are going to be just fine, Knute.  The MWC will try for TCU and fail (duh) then perhaps take Hawaii as a substitute, or take NOBODY AT ALL!

The WAC is going to be just fine.  Its a brave new world!

To which I say, I sure hope so. But with all the things that have happened in college football the past 15 years, it's hard to sleep easy. But here's hopin' Aldous Huxley here is right.

And UCHighlander emailed mw with a promise never to complain about my spelling ever again after he was the recipient of a vicious attack from a pack of anal retentives. They hunt in packs the anals, lying in wait for an honest mistake and then pouncing en masse and hurtling the first stone like a BYU fan complaining about BCS exclusion. It's especially maddening to be a victim of such an attack when you are a closet AR and secretly mock those who misspell words on such pillars of grammatical and spelling excellence like internet sports message boards. I am just such a person. Join with me UCHighlander and we shall share our pain and grow closer in the sharing. Or some such touchy feely Oprah bullsh*t saying. Thanks for olive branch UC.

On to the picks!

BYU vs. Boise State

So the Cougs went to Vegas, hit on 16 and the dealer pulled a 5 outta the deck. Good for them. This is a hard team to get a read on. They have some talent but Gary Glitter doesn't let that stop him. Matt Berry continues to work his way back into game mode and the Cougs avoided some of the mistakes that had plagued them the past few weeks. Mistakes like penalties, turnovers and Gary calling the plays. This week Robbie Bosco called the plays and Gary has said he will continue to let Bosco do that. That thundering crash you all heard was Glitter's ego hitting the floor.

So now the Cougs host Boise State, a team that hung 77 on the San Jose State Mighty Mites last weekend (seriously, how do they keep that program afloat? Even with all the problems the Aggies have had in recent years, they pale in comparison with what has gone on at San Joser.) and Bronco Madmanhall will have his hands full with BSU QB Gimli son of Gloin...er sorry...Ryan Dinwiddie. Both Gimli and Dinwiddie are from the Dwarf clan of Moria so I get them confused. My question is, where do the Broncos find these stud QB's and will they lend one to the Denver Broncos until Jake Plummer is 100%? But I digress.

BSU can score and they do. A lot. More than a smooth California athlete playing the female students at BYU. Can the BYU defense slow them down? If not, can the BYU offense keep up? TOCB says no and hell no.

BSU proves they can bitchslap EVERY team in Utah beating the Whine tonight 34-24.

Utah @ Air Force

The Utes are coming off a tough loss at home versus New Mexico. TOCB didn't take the Lobos seriously last week and it seems the Ute defense didn't either yielding a gazillion points. The Ute offense struggling would have been expected what with the loss of Brandon Warfield on the second play of the game but BWar doesn't play defense. The Lobos should never, EVER hang 47 on a Utah defense.

Now Quag has to go into Colorado Springs and take on the Falcons without Warfield and a defensive coordinator who suddenly lost his father (Fred Whittingham) this past week. What will the sudden adversity do to the Utes? Do they fold like they have so often the past decade or so or do they pull closer together and pull one out and stay in the hunt for the MWC title?

Whatever happens I will be watching with interest to see if the Ute D can squash the 'Bone. I hate the Wishbone offense. HATE IT! And no matter who runs it or how well they run it I want to see it crushed like the hopes of Mike Price's favorite stripper. It is the offense who's name I shall no longer speak. Did I mention I dislike the Wishbone?

Utes overcome adversity and squeak out a win 21-17.

USU vs. Middle Tennessee

I have nothing glib to say about the Aggies  performance last week. No cheap shots or blindsides from Knute because the Ags really put a nice game together and they had contributions from everywhere. Their young secondary continues to play well and they will need to keep it up as MTSU boasts a crisp passing game and the nation's #5 receiver.

One concern I have about the game is the weather. While snow and cold could serve to stun a squad of southern gentlemen into lethargy, I want to know just why so many Aggie fans think it will be to their teams advantage? When exactly did USU become a power football team? On either side of the ball? Sloppy conditions would call for a "mudder" and David Fiefia is not that. In fact, Webster is the anti-mudder and a shifty back like him is at a disadvantage when his feet slide out after every hard cut. The Ags have Richard Watson at their disposal but he is coming off an injury and may not be the best answer. And USU's defensive weakness is against a power running game. So, why the desire for inclement weather? Actually, I think most Aggie fans would like to see a field that is surrounded by snow that has been plowed off and a 35 degree day to go along with their near mile high altitude and a slightly wet surface to slow down MTSU's speedy team rather than an all out mudfest.   

TOCB is having a hard time seeing this one even though I keep slamming it down on my desk trying to clear up the psychic reception. Must be all the solar flares. Too close to call is the word from TOCB but since this column is on an Aggie board I'll play to the homers in the room and we'll say USU prevails 20-17. But don't be surprised if it goes the other way. Or not. How's that for definitive?

That's all for now sports fans. Keep the game on, the sound up and keep blaming those sports related woes on the Cougars!